0

Anxiety is REAL

Anxiety is one of the most overused terms on social media. Everywhere I look I see people saying that things are giving them anxiety and the truth is that these same people probably have never had a panic attack a moment in their life. For those of us that have panic attacks on a daily basis, it can be quite frustrating to even get out of bed some days. We know that once we put our feet on the ground that anything, yes, absolutely anything can trigger it.

I’ve had anxiety since I can remember. I was about five years old when my Kindergarten teacher pointed out that I had severe anxiety, anytime anything changed out of my day, I got severely anxious and sick with worry. I ended up throwing up and at times I would pass out. When I was a child, no one really took it that seriously, I would get so anxious anytime my grandma would leave me and my mom would just say that it was something that I got from my grandma, the worrying for no apparent reason. It really just pissed her off.

Now, that I’m an adult, I have to say that I probably have bigger temper tantrums than my children. When things don’t go as planned or something negative is affecting me in a bad way and I can’t calm down or gain a moment to process it, I throw a fit. I’m not kidding, now I don’t do this in front of my kids, but I either go out to the car or the bathroom and just cry it out and talk to myself about it. See, I’m an empath so everyone around me brings to me their feelings and I pull their feelings into my own and it makes me who I am. I tend to care too deeply for others in pain and that makes me anxious. Then top it off with the stress of adult life, sometimes it leads to an anxiety attack.

What does an attack feel like? Well, it feels like someone has their hands around my neck and I keep trying to breathe and I can’t. It’s like I’m grasping for calmness in this chaotic world and I can never reach it. I just want quiet, silence, no noise, not even the sound of the wind. I want space, but I don’t want to be abandoned. It’s an overflow of fear and panic, and sometimes I don’t even know what causes it. I will be happy one moment and get this sick twisted feeling in the pit of my stomach like something just awful happened to me and I don’t know what it is.

I’m a crunchy mom and don’t believe in medication, I’ve tried CBD oil and sometimes it helps. EO’s and meditation can help me. My point of this post is that there are people out there that think they have anxiety because their brand new acrylic just fell off their finger when in reality they have no idea how it feels to be in the sheer panic over absolutely nothing and everything at the same time.

0

Not Cha Grandma’s Cloth Diapers!

From the title you can tell the topic is about cloth diapers. No, not the safety pin ones silly, they now have buttons!

Cloth diapers are coming back in style because it saves our environment and it saves us money! They are chemical free and wonderful! I started to use cloth diapers on my now 4-year-old when he was born. I had no idea what I was doing and I couldn’t figure out how a cloth diaper worked so I gave up. I called it quits and I regret it. It’s like finding this wonderful gift that you wish you had your entire journey but nope you discovered it at the end of it. Kind of like home birth but that’s a topic for another day.

New Thoughts Vs Old Thoughts

I have a few crunchy friends. They do everything naturally and they choose what is best for their kids. Diapers have a ton of chemicals in them and these chemicals cause diaper rashes and diapers just don’t feel as wonderful as a cloth diaper. My thoughts are the same except I was able to look at it from a new perspective and I realized the first time, I used the diapers wrong. In fact, this is going to sound totally stupid of me but I only purchased the inserts…and didn’t know about the diaper covers. I’m sure if I did a quick Google search I would have discovered that I just needed the diaper covers to go along with it. Here I am 4 years later and 2 babies later…I am so glad I discovered the covers!

Wonderful World of Cloth!

Most women are thrown off at the fact that they will have to throw the diapers into the wash and that is kind of nasty compared to just taking a diaper off and throwing them in the trash. It’s definitely not more convenient to have your baby wearing a cloth diaper. I personally just throw the diapers into a red pail and once I am ready to wash them, I dump that pail into the washer and I’m done with it. It doesn’t take that much more time than throwing away a regular diaper. Plus it’s better for the world.

The best part is what?

I was able to find one size diapers. To my calculation, it saves me over $1500 in diapers. I’m not kidding, diapers cost a lot and this is based on the cheapest diapers you can buy. The best part though is the designs. Your baby gets to wear cute diapers. TyVee has a spaceship one, boats, robots, monkeys, and all different colors. I love his diapers.

Brands

I am all into this crunchy mom thing right now, I mean I have been into it but I just started to go Paleo and eat fewer chemicals and worry about what is in our food. I was on Thrive Market which has a ton of gluten free foods and even household products. I clicked upon diapering and found Charlie Banana cloth diapers for $90. I decided to buy the three for $45. Just a trial pack to test them out and I fell in love with them. They are sold at Walmart and Target.

I am currently looking into the BumGenies diapers to get more variety but I love Charlie Banana so much that I may just stick with them and buy 6 more of their diapers. Right now I have 15.

Conclusion

Cloth diapers are absolutely amazing. They are worry free. Yes, I have to wash them, but I don’t ever run out and I always have extra money to spend on something else other than diapers.

I also use 7th Gen. baby wipes because they are chemical free. They do have cloth wipes, but I prefer the wet wipes still.

0

13 Reasons Why-RATED Part III (Final Review)

Welcome to the final review of the show “13 Reasons Why”. I am going to go into details of the final episode and tell you if I feel you should watch the movie. I am going to do my best to keep the spoilers to a minmum, however I would skip past the review of the final episode if you don’t want spoilers on the ending and go straight to my actual review of the entire show. You can read Part I and Part II of the 13 Reasons Why reviews by clicking on the links.

Here goes the final episode review of 13 Reasons Why- Part III

Tape 7: Side A aka Mr. Porter

Tape 7 has to be the most heartbreaking episode. There was an adult that heard Hannah say she didn’t want to live anymore and he just played it off as if it didn’t mean anything. As an adult and a counselor he should have tried harder to help her and he just didn’t. He allowed her to walk away. Maybe he was just too busy with his wife and his new baby and 2 year old child to care about a teenager. It was his job to hurt her. But, school counselors don’t really care. It’s just a job to them.

The saddest part was the denial of the mother when she found her daughter in the tub. It broke my heart.

Review- Part III

Overall I felt that the show lacked the ability to keep my attention. Sometimes it did an amazing thing that grabbed my attention but it never kept my attention. There were several times that I found myself falling asleep watching it. Or if I paused it, I had a difficult time coming back to watch it. All of the reasons up to #12 weren’t subjectible to suicide for me. I know how it feels to have rumors spread about you and to feel lonley. I know how it is to lose your best friend and go throuh high school with no friends at all. I know how it is to be torn to pieces and have to pick yourself back up. #12 is what did it. I think that’s enough to break any young girl. She had no one to talk to and no where to run. She was isolated and hurt. She was suffocated in her own silence and the only way to be heard was to end it all. There are better shows out there that demonstrates the kind of pain and torture that a person who is suicidal goes through.

 

0

Social Media

Social Media has wonderful aspects and great opportunities. For me though, I have been out of the social media spotlight for a few years. That means I’m a bit behind in my abilities to get followers for my blog and even pages. I’m not going to let that stop me, though.

View Points

Social Media can be a terrific way to meet new friends and to bond with people. I didn’t even know there were so many moms like me. Those that had the same viewpoints as well as loved the natural world we live in. Facebook can be used for so much more than gossip…who knew??

My Social Media Sites

If you look to the right of this blog post —-> you will see the links to my sites…bloggers alike please follow me on my Facebook and I will promise to follow back and affiliate you!

-Queenofhartsxoxo

2

I Failed Whole30

Failure- such a strong word. Many people fail at things. I am admitting to failing at Whole30. It’s not that I don’t want to eat healthily, it’s that I am a sugar addict. My head started hurting and I couldn’t take it anymore, so on day 15 ….I ate a donut.

I know that I could probably make a million excuses of why I decided to eat that donut, but I won’t. I opened the pack for my son and well, I left the urge to get the best of me. I have learned so much about food and the things we put into our bodies, so I don’t want to give up on this journey of eating right, but the rules of  Whole30 are not something I want to deal with.

I was also doing it for all the wrong reasons. One being to lose weight. If you do whole30 it’s not to lose weight, it’s to give up the foods you crave and to cure an addiction of sugar in 30 days… and then you have the choice of going right back to those bad habits. Most people do.

I did lose 15 pounds so it very much does work. It’s just not for me. I am going to try paleo, that way I can have banana pancakes or almond flour ones. I can eat my breakfast pudding, etc.

I am taking my entire family Paleo starting the 1st of April! I will update you on our journey.

0

Whole30- Day 3 (The Hangover)

The great thing about Whole30 is that they have a great support team to help you along the way and there are some absolutely amazing people out there that have been through this entire thing before. They can tell you exactly how you will be feeling the next few days and this site: The Whole30 Timeline will provide some amazing tips and encouragement on how to handle your mood swings and cravings. On Day 3, I hit the Hangover stage, it actually started on Day 2 at the end of the day. My head hurt so bad this day. I just really missed my Dr. Pepper, I woke up missing my Dr. Pepper, it’s all I thought about for hours, I finally went to Sonic and bought me an Iced tea, unsweet and that made the cravings a little less. I almost wanted to give up and just call it quits. But, as I look at my clothes that don’t fit and how unhappy I am with my body, I stuck through it. Reminding myself, Dr Pepper will be here in 27 days.

0

Whole30 (Restart) Day 2

During the middle of the night of Day 2, I started craving sweets, I wanted a candy bar, a donut, anything sweet. Man, how I wanted some chips. But, I held strong and was able to overcome the need for these craving. For Day 2 I had almonds for breakfast, I know it wasn’t the best choice, but I really did not feel like getting up and making anything for myself. For lunch, I ate carrots and my homemade ranch dressing! Yes, it came out great, b.t.w. For dinner, I had two pork chops, a massive salad with my homemade ranch dressing, a banana, applesauce, and green beans.

I think now is the time I’ve realized I don’t totally follow the rules to a T with how I should be eating meals The other day I joined an FB group and found out that banana chia pudding is not compliant because you are replacing the urge to eat real pudding. But, that’s not even how I use it. I use it for my breakfast, I don’t eat it when I want pudding. So, I may continue to eat compliant ingredients and these non-compliant foods, as I breastfeed and I have to get different nutrients from different things. It’s hard to follow the rules when you nurse babies!

Anyways, I’m on Day 9 and am updating this as I go! Wish me luck!