Purge…AND… I’m out✌🏻

Wait… purge?

Have you ever just needed someone’s attention and it’s like you’re screaming so loud but yet no one can hear or see you? Almost as though you’ve become a ghost to people that matter to you. Now don’t get me wrong I am very much aware that people have their own lives and they must live them. However, I am a firm believer that we all need the comfort of other people and to have others in our lives. It’s not healthy to be lonely.

What am I getting at?

Three years ago I left the face of the book, friends, family and everything. The tension and drama got so bad that I was unable to handle the stress of FB. Well, last year I realized how important it is to stay in the zone with my kids school and I can do it easily but FB. Which made me reactivate it and thus starting an entire new chapter in my social media frenzy. I am calling it quits again. I don’t want to be that close to people. I don’t want to check my FB 24/7 to see what others are doing, I don’t want to see someone who dislikes me or me dislike them liking things and then creep on their stuff, I don’t want to feel entrapped in the world of FB and all the problems that come with it. Thus… I am not deactivating it but I will not be participating in my FB profile.

What does this even mean?

It means though I will have an active profile and have friends on there I will not be updating you on my life. Now, I may continue to add photos of the kids every now and then. I will be on my group and still running it. I will have messenger installed on my phone in case teachers need to reach me. I will be available for contact. I will also be running my FB Page with the same name.

All Other Social Media….

I have deleted all my social media apps from FB, Snapchat, all the way to Instagram. If you really want to find me I guess you would know how.

I will be updating you on my recent Keto results and blog changes so please follow me to stay up to date!

No Mother of Mine

Mothers Day, what a wonderful day to celebrate your mother and be celebrated as a mother. However, I will not be celebrating my own mother because she is No Mother of Mine. 

Previously my blog had a ton of posts telling you exactly how I feel about my own mother. Let me take one step back and explain to you that I don’t call her mom. I call her by her first name because to me she isn’t a mother at all. Now, before you start judging me about how I should not treat my mother in such a way, let me tell you a bit about her.

It started off before I was born. She didn’t even want me. She looked into abortions and for some strange reason she backed out. Now, I am thankful for that of course, but she didn’t do it because she had a kind heart. Who knows why she made that choice. She pawned me off on my great grandma’s and she did some pretty awful things when I was a baby. Like put me out in the snow, keep me from my biological father and tell him I wasn’t his, the list can go on forever. When I was a teenager she would tell me I was fat. I really thought I was fat, I wore a jacket every day to cover up my rolls, I was size 7 jeans and 130 pounds, 5′ 6″. I was NOT fat. As I said the list can go on forever.

I’m not mad about the way she used to treat me. It’s how she treats my kids. She has nothing to do with the youngest five. She became very obsessive over my oldest son and she does the same thing to my sisters’ kids except she has a bit more to do with her second son. It got to the point that I had to tell her if she didn’t leave him alone we would get a restraining order. She’s seen my 2nd, 3rd, and 4th son only one time. My last two kids, she hasn’t seen at all. The last time we even spoke to each other was three years ago and it’s because I was stopping to see my grandma. My 2nd son was in the back of the car and my grandma brought up my 4th son’s hair and how curly and poofy it was… and my mom was like “Adam has straight hair” and smiled all big, not even acknowledging my son in the backseat. I said “Tyler has straight hair too” and pointed at him… and she just looked him up and down like she didn’t even care. This argument escalated because I confronted her about coming to the kids birthdays. She never comes to see them and she told me that she has a life and doesn’t have time to come and see my kids. She then told me she doesn’t care about me and walked off.

So, nope I didn’t have a mother to say Happy Mothers Day to..I had a grandmother to say it too. A woman who raised me. A woman who taught me to be a great mom and a woman I look up to. I’m glad she’s here for me still and that she loves all of my babies equally.

Happy Mothers Day to all of you moms! Please share what your kids got you! Mine got me some amazing handmade cards from school and chocolates!