Purge…AND… I’m out✌🏻

Wait… purge?

Have you ever just needed someone’s attention and it’s like you’re screaming so loud but yet no one can hear or see you? Almost as though you’ve become a ghost to people that matter to you. Now don’t get me wrong I am very much aware that people have their own lives and they must live them. However, I am a firm believer that we all need the comfort of other people and to have others in our lives. It’s not healthy to be lonely.

What am I getting at?

Three years ago I left the face of the book, friends, family and everything. The tension and drama got so bad that I was unable to handle the stress of FB. Well, last year I realized how important it is to stay in the zone with my kids school and I can do it easily but FB. Which made me reactivate it and thus starting an entire new chapter in my social media frenzy. I am calling it quits again. I don’t want to be that close to people. I don’t want to check my FB 24/7 to see what others are doing, I don’t want to see someone who dislikes me or me dislike them liking things and then creep on their stuff, I don’t want to feel entrapped in the world of FB and all the problems that come with it. Thus… I am not deactivating it but I will not be participating in my FB profile.

What does this even mean?

It means though I will have an active profile and have friends on there I will not be updating you on my life. Now, I may continue to add photos of the kids every now and then. I will be on my group and still running it. I will have messenger installed on my phone in case teachers need to reach me. I will be available for contact. I will also be running my FB Page with the same name.

All Other Social Media….

I have deleted all my social media apps from FB, Snapchat, all the way to Instagram. If you really want to find me I guess you would know how.

I will be updating you on my recent Keto results and blog changes so please follow me to stay up to date!

Keto Challenge

Hello everyone! It’s been such a long time since I’ve made an update on here. I really need to start doing better at creating posts, my life is just so busy and there would be such good information that I could post daily so that you could follow me throughout my life. I’m just super busy. We actually just moved, we’re not even finished with the entire move, I’ll update you later on that and how it went.

I want to discuss the Keto diet today. As you know awhile back, maybe a little less than a year ago I attempted to do Whole 30 and I completely and totally utterly failed the challenge. Day 10 hit and I was so sick because of the sugar addiction and breastfeeding, I just couldn’t do it. After that I did attempt to do Paleo which I didn’t necessarily fail, I still pretty much stick to the diet except it was difficult over summer when I’d go visit family and they would cook. I know what’s healthy eating and what’s not now, which is amazing.

The thing about Keto that I find highly challenging is the fact that I don’t eat dairy and that’s totally okay on the Keto challenge. Then it limits your fruit intake because it is a Low Carb, High Fat diet. I’m worried about that, I love my fruits and veggies. I totally failed being vegetarian though, that is a discussion for another day as well.

This challenge is obviously going to be difficult for me and I’ve been waiting an entire year to start it because of how restrictive it is. The reason I had to wait is that my baby just turned a year old last month and I still currently breastfeed him, just not as much.

I want to be able to have my followers follow with me through this journey and see if I can get on the right path to a healthy lifestyle. I plan on including exercise and I am also taking Slique from Young Living, yes I know you should not digest oils, please if you read this, don’t take my word for digesting oils, I am doing this out of my own decision making. I suggest you read up on the safety of oil ingesting before you continue down that path.

Now, you know I don’t post a blog every day, I am going to try to be better at it. I will try to update at least once a week on the Keto diet, but daily on my Facebook page, please follow me here.


I am the Omega woman

People, who know me know that I love werewolves and vampires, so why not use the terminology to describe myself? Omega actually does not come from the lonesome wolf that we all know. It comes from the Greek word meaning a person who has been or feels rejected by society. Being rejected by society is not always a bad thing and here’s a post on how I am the Omega woman.

Not many people can actually really say they associate with me. They don’t know my thoughts or what is going on in my day to day life. Heck, they don’t even stop to say hi to me when they do see me. I know some people just add me on Facebook to be nosey but there is nothing to find there. I post about my kids and crunchy things. Maybe a humorous post here and there, but nothing really that come from my mind and heart.


I keep to myself. I have not always been this way. I actually started out posting all my cry baby business on Facebook because being a crybaby was my life and I am the first to admit this. I was so down on myself and had no shame in letting the entire world know how I really felt about my relationship. I’m actually ashamed of this.

I spend 99% of my time with my kids and doing mom things. Most of my friends don’t do this. If there’s an event at the school, you bet I’m there in each and every one of my kid’s classes. If my kid needs help with homework, I’m there to help him through it and to teach him what he doesn’t know. If the splash pad is open, you bet I’ll be going to that once a week or multiple times just to spend time with my kids. There’s a new superhero movie out, I’ll be there to see it with my boys.

I don’t allow others to tell me how to parent my kids. Like those people who ask why I’m so picky about the chemicals coming in my household or who get sick of hearing me talk about organic this or organic that. Hey, if you’re sick of it, there’s a door and please don’t talk about your bad chemical filled household, I don’t judge you, please don’t judge me.

I’m an open book. You have a question? I’ll answer it.

I push people away and I really can’t help it. I’ve had a ton of those people that were here one day to get their entertainment on and gone the next. I’m used to it. Please don’t let that door hit you on the way out because I’m not here to entertain you.

My loyalty game is strong. I’m loyal to my kids first and above all, my husband comes in a close second and friends/family are last. If they don’t like you, chances are I don’t like you.

I don’t fit it. I don’t go clubbing, I don’t care if you like my car or my house or the way I dress. I don’t care if you like that I breastfeed, cloth diaper, or the way I walk. This is me, you either like it or take a hike.

I am there for people even when they aren’t for me.


I am an Omega because I choose to be different. I don’t really go around saying I’m an Omega woman, but this is the term that can describe how I am. I don’t care what others think or how they feel anymore. I will not respond to the pettiness of others.



A Home Birth: My Sixth Birthing Story-2016

As  I mentioned in my previous post, our last baby was supposed to be our last. I mean, no neither one of us made a permanent birth control decision, but we were content with the five kids we did have. The reason I didn’t want to make it permanent was because we were both so young and maybe one d ay we would want just one more baby. Well, on March 29th, my husbands birthday in 2016 we found out we were having another baby. The entire first few weeks we were anxious to see if this one would be a girl. We even took a  test called Sneek Peak and it’s basically to see if there’s any male fetal DNA  in your blood system. Mine came back a Boy. We thought that since our home was full of boys, that their DNA could have gotten on the package somehow, so we didn’t lose hope. I went to a 3D ultrasound pretty early, 14 weeks to be exact and turned out even that showed a boy. I cried because I knew this was it for me, we couldn’t just keep having babies because we want a girl. It means that I’d never get to go on mommy/daughter dates, etc. I cried because I was so angry that I was upset about the sex of my baby. It’s a legit feeling, though, it’s called gender disappointment. When I had my final ultrasound, I cried again because I knew at that point, he had to be a boy. I eventually got over it. As you will see in my birthing story.

This time it was all different, I didn’t go to a doctors office for check ups and I had a very close friend of mine who had done home births in the past. We live pretty far away from family, so we really had no one to help with the other five boys and we honestly don’t trust strangers. I decided that I was going to give it a shot and have a home birth. I remember when I first met my midwife and student midwife, I was so nervous because I had never done a home birth. They are really wonderful women. To do what they do, it takes something great.

After meeting her the first time, I started going to the birthing center once a month for check up’s until 36 weeks. Then it was every other week after that. I even got to choose whether or not to do the glucose test, you know that nasty orange drink? I could even do an alternative, this time, I decided to sit it out. Since I didn’t have any previous gestational diabetes I thought it would be okay. I had to go to a special lab to get my blood work done and the best part is, she never had to feel all over me when I went to my appointments. They were all pretty simple, she’d check the babies heart, measure the baby and my uterus, we’d talk about random things or she’d make sure she’d address any questions I may have had.

As you know, home birthing has no pain medication options, but, I was willing to take that step since my last son, I had no pain medication.  I was so sure that the baby would get here earlier than expected, I was due on December 2nd, 2016 and the day came and went. I got so frustrated because I was so tired and huge and my body just hurt. I was also really concerned that if I didn’t have him by 42 weeks, I’d be forced to go to the hospital and miss out on my home birth experience. I hit  41 weeks and by that time, it was like time was so slow, I could feel every single second of time becuase I just wanted the baby out. After 42 weeks there are supposedly higher risks your baby will be born still born. Well, 41 weeks hit and the days were counting. I had tried everything to help the baby come, nothing worked. Well,  I finally got out my breast pump and started pumping, I started having steady contractions… I went to get my 4-year-old a bath, as I bent down to wash his hair, my water just trickled down my legs. I remember yelling at my husband telling him “OMFG, MY WATER JUST BROKE” the kids all looked around trying to figure out, what water broke, trying to make me feel better. I was so scared because anytime my water broke before, the contractions got more painful. I started to shake because I was in such a hurry and I called the midwife to let her know. She showed up about 30 minutes later, I filled the birthing pool with hot water, and we waited. No baby. Nothing happened. So, the midwife checked me and said that I was dilated to a 2. That I could call her back if the contractions got heavier.

I tried resting through the night, but I just wanted to get my baby here. I also heard that 24 hours after your water breaks your midwife forces you to go to the hospital and it had me so stressed out because again, I wanted a home birth and at this point, I did not have a backup plan for our kids to be taken care of. I would start to contract and then it would stop when I got into the birthing pool, at this point I had no idea water helps stop contractions. About an hour before the 24-hour mark I contacted my midwife, told her to come on ahead and she showed up about an hour later. She checked me and she said I was a zero this time (weird right?) I almost started to cry when she told me that she has to let me know that after 24 hours there’s a risk of infection, but I do not have to go to the hospital. I was so relieved. She started giving me a tincture to help the contractions, she was going to do a membrane sweep, but she went to do it and it turns out that I was actually dilated to a 5, not a zero.  There was scar tissue which was preventing me from fully dilating and allowing her to check. The bad news? The baby hadn’t dropped far enough for her to do a membrane sweep. So, I took the tincture every 15 minutes, pumped for 15 minutes, walked for 15 on and off for a few hours. Then, once the contractions got steady and close together, I just walked and walked and walked until they hurt so bad I wanted in the water.

My midwife lets me get into the birthing pool to see if the contractions would stay, though they barely got too close together, I was contracting and they were painful. I kept my cool,  I kept it together because I don’t want other women to see me weak. Even though this was my strongest moment. The water was so great, so much relief from the pain, and I could just float there and be weightless with the world. It was wonderful. But, I went into transitioning and the pain just came on. At some point the baby was starting to come, I had to get out of the water, but begged the midwife to just drain the water out with me in there, she refused for safety reasons, which I understand. I got out and the student midwife, who was also a doula helped calm me and she helped me  through the contraction until I was able to get back in the water. After that, I decided I couldn’t do this anymore and I pushed out our sixth son.

After getting to hold my baby for the first time, I didn’t even check to make sure he was a boy until 20 minutes later when the midwife h ad to remind me to check! I was so happy to see him, it was just like a wave of love and emotions came over me. All I wanted to do was hold him. The midwife made sure he was okay, did a newborn screening and made sure I was doing okay before she left.

This experience was one of the greatest. I feel like its the closest I have ever been to one of my newborn babies, the closest the other kids got to be to one of their brothers. We didn’t have nurses coming in and bothering us, we had each other. I got to sleep in my own bed and take a shower in my own shower. I didn’t have to drive home or get in the car and come home, because I was already here, with my new baby. He was so used to all the sounds that when my 2-year-old threw a tantrum he didn’t even budge. It made me feel so str

It made me feel so strong to be able to have my son at home and to be able to have a midwife that was on the same level as me instead of a doctor that would force me to do things I did not want to do or agree with.  To allow my body to do what it was always meant to do and get ready when it was meant to be ready. FullSizeRender-1.jpg



Fifth Birthing Experience-2014

My fifth baby was supposed to be our last baby. At this point, we had given up any hopes of having a girl and the excitement happened before we ever made it to our induction date. We were married 4  days before we had the fifth baby. I was so scared he’d want to go ahead and come out during our wedding, as I was walking down the aisle, but nope he stayed put.

Our induction day was scheduled for  April 20th, 2014, which was Easter.  I  had celebrated Easter with the other four boys prior to going to the hospital to get induced. As luck would have it, though, I didn’t  get induced. I was already having contractions when  I arrived and two hours later they were getting stronger and stronger.  By the fourth hour, the new nurse they decided to stick me with  (who felt she would have an uneventful evening)  would not listen to me about how bad the pain was.  You have to understand,  I  usually received an epidural before it got too bad, except with baby number three.  but, this time no luck.  She gave me some type of medication that put me to sleep. She refused to see how far  I was dilated and swore w e wouldn’t have the baby until t he next afternoon,  this w as about  8 pm at this point.  There was no way I’d hurt that bad for that long.  I begged for my epidural,  the nurse refused to call to have the doctor come and do it. About   10 pm the doctor sent the nurse to finally check to see how far I was dilated, I was an 8! Then I finally hit a  10 five minutes later.  The nurse went to prep and said the doctor was on the way.

My husband was on the phone and I just kept screaming and screaming, I told him I won’t’ stop until I get my epidural. I finally felt the urge to push, I gave   up on the epidural at  that point and told my husband we need a doctor,  he went to the hall to find one, the nurse came  back in, getting ready to take the bed  apart so I could push when the doctor was there, she  turned around to talk to another nurse after I begged h er to let me go  ahead and push, she told me to hold it. It’s called the Fetal  Ejection Reflex,  my body ejected the baby because the nurse had waited too long to allow me to push him out.

He w as the first one  I did not have any medication with.  The pain was gone instantly. I remember trying to reach for h into h help him stop crying. The nurse turned around in shock because he was between my legs on the bed. The doctor came in at that point with her eyes wide o n the baby and surprised. I told her,  that I kept telling the nurse I needed to have him now.


My Second Birthing Experience- 2011


As I mentioned in my last blog this is a series of my birthing experiences. I have six boys in all. My second son was actually supposed to be a girl. So, I have to say that this was the most surprising birthing experience in all.

I had my second son at the same hospital with the same doctor. I loved my doctor, though, now I don’t agree with all the choices or actions or convincing done on her part with each of my births I had.

I actually lived about 2 hours away this time from the hospital and my doctor was afraid that I would go into labor 2 hours away. On Feb 13th, 2011, I started having contractions and pains so I drove all the way to the hospital and didn’t really expect to have my daughter son, I just wanted to make sure that I wasn’t in actual labor. We got there in the middle of the night and my doctor came in to see me, she  was happy that I made it. I was only 37 weeks pregnant, for those that haven’t ever had a baby, this is the lowest you can be to be considered full term and it’s very dangerous to be induced as you don’t always know if your actual due date is off by a week or two. It can cause your baby to be born prematurely and put in the NICU. Lucky for me, that was not the case.

The doctor did start the Pitocin right away and my labor went pretty fast. She broke my water, just like she did with my first son and I got an epidural before I started to feel any pain. This had to be the easiest birth I ever had. I did take a bit longer to push him out because he was so small.

When he was born he was 6 lbs 10.5 ounces, he was NOT ready to be born, he should have been a few more pounds, but he was born on Valentines Day. They told me he was a boy and I screamed because I knew they had to be wrong, the ultrasound said he was a girl! Indeed, I now have a 5 year old boy to prove that he is definitely a boy and not a girl.

In this experience, I would have changed being induced so early. In fact the law changed the next year and they cannot induce you until 39 weeks now. This prevents any accidental inductions.

My First Birthing Experience- Year of 2008

Before I get started, I want to say that I am doing this all by memory. Being a mother, you never forget your babies births, no matter how many you have. I now have six sons. Every day this week, I will be posting the experiences from hospital births, epidurals, to home births, and dealing with the pain. This is all from my perspective as the mother. How I felt during this time.

My first birthing experience was in August 2008. My pregnancy was fine, I had no issues, gained the right amount of weight, and my baby was a healthy 8lbs and 11 ounces when he was born. I remember walking into the doctors office on my due date, naive as can be because, it was my due date after all, I was going to have the baby. I mean surely the doctor would get him out since it was his “due date”. Now let me step in right here to remind you, that a due date is just an estimate it’s not actually the day your baby will be here. About 5-10% of babies are born on the estimated due date. Many factors go into this calculated date, such as when you conceived, the day of your last period, and the baby will tell you when they are ready to arrive. I didn’t know any of this. I learned a long the way everything I know now. Sadly, my doctor told me that the baby wouldn’t be here for some time due to the fact that I was not dilated or effaced at all. I was devastated. She also informed me that in about a week she would be leaving on vacation so she had to schedule me an induction for me at 41 weeks in order to give birth to my son. Again, I was devastated. I told her I’d prefer not to be induced and she said that she would not be able to deliver my baby so she lead me to believe I had no other choice than to be induced. I went along with it. She also informed me that if the induction failed, I’d have to have a C-Section, again, devastated. But, I went along with it. I was 19 years old and had no idea how birthing worked and up until 40 weeks, I had no clue they could force a baby to be born.

After my doctors appointment I went home and looked up ways to help you dilate. I read a lot about Evening Primrose Oil and went and got some, I put it by my cervix, I do want to point out this is not a good idea unless you research medication or herbs, I am not a doctor and am not recommending the use of EPO. It did NOT work for me at this point. I went to the hospital at 41 weeks and was still a zero.

So, at the hospital I had to get undressed and put a night gown on and lay in the bed. They strapped me down with cables and monitors to keep track of the contractions and the babies heart rate. They put an IV in my arm even though I did not need it right away. Then they told me very little about what was going on and put a Cervidil next to my cervix so that I could start to dilate. My doctor asked me if I’d want an epidural and I told her no. The nurses were shocked and  couldn’t believe it and told me they’d keep the pain doctor on call in case I changed my mind. A few hours had passed and they finally took the pill out. I was only a 1 at that point, so it was working, but my doctor didn’t seem convinced. Again, mentioning a C-Section, which made me cry. I didn’t want a C-Section. She then ruptured my membranes, aka broke my water. Back then, I didn’t think anything of it, but you are supposed to give birth to a baby within 24 hours after your water breaks, especially in a hospital setting, they will try to force you to agree to a C-Section. Induction can fail, but you still have a choice, do not let them break your water if you do not want a C-Section. Premature breaking of your water can be a bad thing. Again, this is something I did not know at the time. They also went ahead and started the Pitocin drip to start up contractions.

Luckily for me, my water made me dilate faster, I ended up with the epidural and felt nothing after that. A few minutes after I received the epidural I was ready to push. I pushed for about 10 minutes and my first born son was born. After the epidural, I could barely walk because I was numb. I immediately was able to take a shower once the pain meds wore off. They continued the Pitocin afterwards to firm up my uterus.

If I could go back, I’d wait a little longer to see if he could be here on his own, I’d also refuse the epidural the entire time. One of my birthing stories will explain the logic behind why I’d do all of this.adamdadjad.jpg